I can’t see you, I don’t need you

Yeah, I’ll get back to last week even­tu­ally, I promise. I HAVE A LOT OF THINGS GOING ON IN MY LIFE RIGHT NOW. I know, I don’t believe it either.
THE DREAM IS OVER. THE DREAM IS OVER. I promised myself I wouldn’t cry. Poor George. I had a bad feel­ing on Tuesday. I had a worse feel­ing on Monday, when he revis­ited “Take Me to the Pilot” and the magic was sim­ply not there any­more. And right when Christopher found out George was an omelette chef. He’s got a lot of respect for omelette chefs. Poor Christopher. He was dev­as­tated for about two min­utes, and then he went back to deal­ing with The W. Aww, but look at the guy, happy as all clams dur­ing his good-​bye video! Good for him. He’s gonna be all cheer­ful no mat­ter what. What a swell fel­low. It’s just too bad he just got worse as the series went on. His raw unspoiled tal­ent was bet­ter left raw and unspoiled. I didn’t think he was hor­ri­ble on Tuesday though or any­thing. He was just … OK, I guess? And extra points for doing a Fred Astaire song. Fred’s the mack. You know who sucked it high and hard, though. Oh yeah, you know it.
Monkey ass mickey fickey. OK, I don’t get it, dawg. Who all has got­ten on this creepy band­wagon? Who? I can’t imag­ine who could pos­si­bly be vot­ing for her, and vot­ing for her A LOT. I mean, come on. She was flat dur­ing the entire first song and sharp dur­ing the entire sec­ond. Also, she sucked. She needs to get ready for the Judgment Day, that’s right. Ugh. I’m on that planet of peo­ple who have ears that func­tion prop­erly and are dri­ven to insan­ity by the judges who clearly aren’t hear­ing any­thing right. How they could have even remotely praised this nasal lit­tle pig-​faced crab cake I will never know. I want … I want THE GOD NEPTUNE to walk out onstage and spear her with his tri­dent and throw her to pira­nhas. Why yes, I am drunk right now.
It’s the return of the curse of the creature’s ghost (a.k.a. Leah Labelle) because I LIKED HER. I did. I didn’t think she was good but she was watch­able and enjoy­able and had a cer­tain smi­ley pres­ence of cute­ness that had me root­ing for her. It was like last year, when both Josh and Clay did “To Love Somebody” dur­ing Bee Gees week and I thought Josh kicked Clay’s ass because it might not have been as “tech­ni­cally pro­fi­cient” a per­for­mance or what­ever, but he meant it like CRAZY and it ruled. You know, because there was all that hot sub­text because he was like a Marine and shit and dammit, that’s right, we don’t know what it’s like to love some­body the way he does. You know? Also, wasn’t that the week he got voted off? Oh well. Anyway, I swear my anal­ogy still stands … some­how. It all made sense yes­ter­day. P.S., Filipina power, keep ya head up my sis­ter. I hope Diana gets killed to DEATH by the revenge of the Island Vote next week, I hope I hope I hope.
She is still boring-​ass bor­ing and you can­not con­vince me oth­er­wise. I am stead­fast. I can­not be swayed. Also, she was crazy shrill and over­s­ingy on both those songs. I’m just not impressed by her at all. I’d rather see Jasmine win before this one. Yeah, I said it. SHE’S BORING. You know who else I’d rather see win?
I know, I can’t believe it either, but I thought she was great great great great and yes, I really do like Queen. You can say two things about this lady, and that is a) she’s smart and b) she’s got GIGANTIC BALLS. Well, maybe I’d say those things before you would? But any­way, that makes for excit­ing pos­si­bil­i­ties. DON’T DENY IT. I agree that she’s a big cam­era hog and her whole “THIS IS FOR YOU, JENNIFER, WE LOVE YOU” crap last week made me sick sick sick (I’ll get back to that even­tu­ally, I swear!!!) but it didn’t annoy me as much as when that blonde dime­store Lisa Marie Presley did it last year. I can’t remem­ber her name, but you know the one. And of course this week she had to be all “Oh with­out John Stevens it’s not the same blah blah” which is irri­tat­ing, of course, but SMART! Because peo­ple are STUPID and they will BUY that she is SINCERE!!! At least this week Fantasia tried to have fun with the theme and do some­thing that no one else would do, and it was good! I mean, “What Are You Doing the Rest of Your Life?,” that took heavy duty balls and she was great great great great and I got a lit­tle teary-​eyed right there with Paula and I’m not even hep­ped up on heavy painkillers. You can’t go wrong with Michel Legrand~~~, and if you do, I will hunt you down and kill you. I mean, have you seen The Happy Ending? Holy bananas, that movie. So any­way, I won’t be hunt­ing her down or killing her. And yes, I would vote for her over LaToya any day of the week and be flip­ping happy about it.
That doesn’t mean I’m par­tic­u­larly moti­vated to vote for any­one, still. I’m stick­ing with my promise, I swear.

3 comments to I can’t see you, I don’t need you

  • Kim

    Blackberry Way” by the Move

  • pieman

    George was tons bet­ter last night after he got kicked off than he was on Tuesday.
    Diana needs to go. I can’t watch her. My wife left the room when she was on. She yelled back “I can still hear her! Turn it down!“
    I am hav­ing a run­ning argu­ment with a co-​worker on LaToya. I say she’s bland. The co-​worker is ga-​ga over her. She’s so great, blah blah blah. I, of course, am cor­rect.
    I thought Jasmine was pretty good. Fantasia was good this week, though I had a large amount of trou­ble try­ing to get past her singing Freddie Mercury.
    It seems both you and Mr. Trax write pretty well while intox­i­cated, too!

  • Kim

    You know, I didn’t even real­ize how awe­some this mix was until now, when I was post­ing it vs. all this MN.-related music-​type stuff. Pretty great eh? Yeah that’s right!!! J-​Girl, you know you have to come join us in the MN-​type hap­pen­ings, because this is where it is at. Even more so than YHIF. Yeah, you know what I’m talk­ing about. Excellent. CARLTON! HI!!!