I came home early to take a nap and I just woke up now! Ryan has his G-​man look on tonight. THIS is American Idol!

Please enjoy this Up With People per­for­mance of “All I Ask of You,” for that is all they ask of you. The dudes some­how sound much bet­ter together than the girls do. Ahhh my ears! Enjoy Lloyd Lord Andrew Lord Lloyd Webber on the piano! He does this turn­ing toward the audi­ence and singing bit at the end of the song that is DRAMATIC and FREAKISH. I kind of find it to be kind of awe­some. Abigail Breslin approves!

Let’s check out this hot molten hot lava bomb of clips from last night! Hahaha LAWL’s Moody Blues-​esque voice-​over on top of the glow-​effect tape of the judges with Phantom masks is really quite phenomenal.

Ryan goes inside the Actors Studio with LAWL. His imp­ish urchin-​like enthu­si­asm is strangely com­pelling. Brooke is clearly dis­pleased that they bring up her false start and reg­is­ters smug glee when LAWL some­how jus­ti­fies it. Oh whatever.

The FORD MUSIC VIDEO! salutes Danny Noriega with “Tainted Love.” I guess this is a Sin City–type treat­ment, which is being extremely gen­er­ous. Carly try­ing to destroy things? You don’t say.

The President and First Lady salute Idol Gives Back. Just one per­son with tal­ent can win over an audi­ence of mil­lions! You don’t say!
We’re in Bottom Two mode. The audi­ence cheers “the safety zone.” This show is weird. (You don’t say.)

David C. says Andrew Lloyd Webber is one of the most defin­able song­writ­ers. He gives him­self a lot of credit for being unpre­dictable by singing it straight­for­wardly. Uh. David A. appears to have some kind of post-​traumatic stress dis­or­der. They’re both safe!

The shot back­stage at the four remain­ing con­tes­tants reveals Jason to be yawn­ing. Highlight of the night, or dare I say hii­i­igh­light.

Let’s look at all­l­l­l­lll the Idol alumni on Broadway, which means check­ing in with the lat­est stage of Clay’s bizarre ongo­ing makeover. Only he and Tamyra appear to have been cor­dial enough to con­tribute new inter­views. Now here’s Leona Lewis! FLAMES!

Let’s bring out Brooke and Syesha! Brooke is safe! Syesha is not! Let’s bring out Jason and Carly! Jason is safe! Carly is not!


That’s … fas­ci­nat­ing. Chris thinks Carly jinxed her­self by say­ing she’s going to have fun “from now on.” Now let’s make them both sing! Chris: “You hav­ing fun now?!”

An arson­ist strikes again! From sunny and warm to stormy and cool. And who is Jared Allen? TONIGHT on the Fox 9 News at 9!

Ryan says it’s time to put these two lovely ladies out of their mis­ery! They’re both gone? You’d think they’re being sent to the gas cham­ber. Jeez, drama. Who’s tanked?

ai08_carlys.jpgLet’s cel­e­brate her home! America is the land of oppor­tu­nity and dreams. Simon apol­o­gizes for giv­ing her a com­pli­ment last night. “Kiss of death!” So long, big girl chest voice.

Whew. We made it through that one, didn’t we?

2 comments to ::Yawn::

  • pieman

    I love Jason. Catching him yawn­ing back­stage was the per­fect shot.
    I love how Ryan asks the judges if America gets it right each week. Hey Ryan, by this point it doesn’t mat­ter how any­body sings, it’s just a pop­u­lar­ity con­test. None of the grown-​ups where I work vote (and many watch the show), so it’s the teenagers with these new-​fangled tex­ting devices that are vot­ing. And who doesn’t love the stoner with the dreads?
    Syesha will be gone next. Then Brooke, leav­ing the three dudes to bat­tle it out. Because those teenagers vot­ing are girls, not boys.
    Am I wrong?
    I don’t think so.

  • tammy

    David C singing LALW = The Douche of the Opera
    Also, they should do a Ford com­mer­cial with a Wizard of Oz theme, cuz Jason would make a per­fect Scarecrow.