Don’t go against what you’re great at

Redemption! Tenacity! Wow, Ryan is pil­ing on the drama. Batshit Tatiana fright­ens me with her WIDE STANCE. Paula’s out­fit is sim­ply spectacular.

MC Skat Kat on my mind

I want her entire look. I can’t stop star­ing at her.

ai09_jesselI already know she doesn’t make it, which means I’ve already been told some­thing good! This is hor­ri­ble. She should have con­sid­ered wear­ing some kind of stock­ings with that out­fit. At least she learned how to keep her mouth shut while the judges are talk­ing. Paula tells her she has a whole unique thing about her. There’s noth­ing unique about sucking.

ai09_mattgHe is singing for his life! He is adorable. He AND his pash­mina, Pieman.


He wants to be your new HAT MAN. The entire sec­ond half of the song is entirely made of up “whoa” and “yeah.” I do not care. Hilarious how Simon brings up Taylor Hicks and every­one is like AHHHH BOOOOO NOOOOOO. If he doesn’t make it through I might just snap.

ai09_megancHopefully I can … rock the house?” Oh girl, no. She’s singing that song about giv­ing her cherry to a big black horse. She is just boooooor­ing. And she can’t enun­ci­ate for shit. Or wear a bra. Simon has a total bone for her.

Raw emo­tion™ in the house. Sorry does indeed seem to be the hard­est word. He looks ter­ri­fied and des­per­ate, and he sounds des­per­ate and ter­ri­fied. He also looks like he lost 10 pounds since the day before. Bring that Sam Harris magic back! Ugh. Chris: “Shoulda worn a hat.” Mmm, Essence of Von. Smells like failure.

ai09_jasminem¡Reflejo! If you are doing a Xtina song, you would be wise to not also com­pletely mimic her vocally. Simon gives her a brave choice award. They’re all like ooh aah and I do not under­stand why.

ai09_rickybDude needs to learn how to close his mouth. His entire face makes me uncom­fort­able. Superstition ain’t the wang! The ladies are like yay and the guys are like boo.

She is in love with every­body and every­thing. I would have rec­om­mended black stock­ings with that out­fit. She’s sav­ing all her love for you! Man, she is joy­less. Talk talk talk talk. Her bat­shit­ness is con­ta­gious and Paula’s caught it. Paula says “frickin’.” Talk talk talk. Randy: “It’s like being on a ship of sorts on high seas.” Talk talk talk talk. There are sala­cious doings with kneel­ing and crotch levels.

ai09_anoopdLadies love my polo-​shirt-​wearin’ brother. It’s his pre­rog­a­tive. BRING IT. Oh, his par­ents are adorable. Paula: “You’re whip­pin’ out moves that are a lit­tle nasty.” Oh hell yes.

Let’s get it over with. Who makes it through?

ai09_jasminemai09_megancUgh. Suck it.

Oops, the DVR ran out, so I don’t get to find out how many of my favorite boys (out of two) get canned. Time to resort to online video resources, and:

ai09_mattgai09_anoopdWell F yes. Best news I’ve heard in all forever.

At least they got some­thing right. I guess we get an extra week of com­pe­ti­tion since they’re ditch­ing Idol Gives Back this year. Makes me wanna do the lasso.


5 comments to Don’t go against what you’re great at