And a peetridge in a poop tree

I feel our lives are all the richer for hav­ing wel­comed “Nick & Jessica’s Family Christmas” into our home. We’re cel­e­brat­ing the tri­umphant return of 98º. Somewhere in America, G“ K“““ fever­ishly updates his con­tro­ver­sial report on the decline of the boy band phe­nom­e­non, cer­tain some­one will still pay him if he deliv­ers it […]

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You stay the hell away from me, Baby Dracula

I’m glad Halloween’s over. I’m not a big fan of it. I’m a fan of the con­cept, maybe, but the exe­cu­tion is lack­ing. Little kids in cos­tumes? Adorable. Adults in cos­tumes? Pointless. Parties full of peo­ple in cos­tumes? Disgusting. I don’t want to will­ingly sub­ject myself to a worst night­mare sit­u­a­tion that is cloaked […]